Minimize ?No.?
How many times a day do you tell your child ?no?? You probably use ?no? a lot to tell your child not to get into the cabinet, not to pull the dog?s fur, not to color on the floor, not to get that cookie, and about a hundred other things that you don?t want him to do during the day.
What?s the problem? Your child starts to be conditioned to hearing the word ?no.? Not only does the word start to lose its effectiveness for when it actually matters, but you also start to create a negative environment that is defined by limits rather than encouraging learning and exploration.
Work on saving ?no? for times that it really matters: Your child is trying to climb a bookcase, hitting his sister, or running toward the road. ?No? can then become a powerful deterrent that may save your child from harm. Meanwhile, learning to stop saying ?no? when you are simply feeling annoyed or inconvenienced and learning to create a ?yes? environment instead can help encourage your child to explore in a healthy way and to learn new things.
Use Gentle Discipline
There have been numerous studies in recent years that have shown the harm that spanking and other physical discipline can have on a child?s emotional and mental development, as well as the relationship that child forms with his or her parents.? Choose to use gentle discipline instead to set limits and teach true lessons while also fostering a strong relationship with your child.
Many methods are available, including time outs (or time ins), redirection, and positive communication. Using gentle discipline will help minimize tantrums and other incidents of lashing out, and it will help you develop a stronger bond with your child.
Set Your Child Up for Success.
How does your child behave when she hasn?t gotten enough sleep? Or when he hasn?t eaten in a while? Chances are your child behaves just like you do when you?re tired, hungry, sick or otherwise not feeling well: Cranky, short-tempered, whiny even. You are sure to deal with more temper tantrums, lashing out, and general ?naughtiness? when your child is feeling this way.
Help set your child up for success by providing him what he needs to feel and behave well: A good night?s sleep, adequate naps, quality nutrition, and good health care. Also work to create an environment that sets him up for success. For example, if you don?t want him to get into your sewing items, put them where he can?t reach them. If you know he won?t be able to resist the cookies on the counter, put them in the refrigerator (or just don?t buy them or make them in the first place).
Setting your child up for success minimizes the conflict in your home and the amount of discipline you will need to do. You want to help your child succeed so that you can spend your energy on loving attention and praise.
Find Time to Connect.
Positive parenting is all about building a strong relationship with your child. Finding time for connection is a key part of that.
Spend a little time each day enjoying one-on-one time with your child. Make sure you are fully present and that distractions such as television, phones, or computers are not present. You can spend time reading, playing together, or even just talking. What you are doing is not as important as you being fully present for the time you spend.
Positive parenting is a great way to build strong and successful relationships with your children. There are many ways to incorporate it into your life, but these are a few of the most basic principles, and implementing any of these strategies can have a big impact in your home.
Do you practice positive parenting? What are some of the strategies you use that have the most impact? Share your thoughts in the comments!
Catie Keeler is the primary researcher and writer for mortgagerates.info. Her most recent accomplishments include graduating from the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill with a degree in business and communications. Her current focus for the site involves mortgage rate comparisons.
The views and opinions expressed in this or any guest post featured on our site are those of the guest author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and views of Everyday Christianity.
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